It's a wonderful life...

"It's a Wonderful Life" really is a wonderful movie.  Tonight I caught the beginning of it before heading to Christmas Eve service and then caught the end of it after the service ended.

Before service, I saw life for George Bailey on the night before he was to leave for college.  The last scene I watched was as he was walking Mary home after the dance and he had just made a wish by throwing a stone through the window of an old home.  He was so full of hope and expectation.  On that eve of what George thought would be his life changing forever by leaving for college he said "I know what I'm gonna do tomorrow, and the next day, and the next year, and the year after that." 

So much joy and excitement for what lies ahead,
but oh those are dangerous and presumptuous words to utter. 

I've seen the movie.  I know that what tomorrow holds for George is not leaving for college, but his life changing forever as his father dies and he assumes his father's role leading the town's building and loan.  This is NOT the life he thought he'd be living.  This is NOT the life he wanted or had planned for or dreamed about.  He is burdened by it.  He marries Mary and there are glimmers of good, but he longs for more and is dissatisfied with what has been as it is not at all as he had imagined it to be.  So when things at the building and loan go sour, George goes into a downward spiral.

Doesn't life seem to have a way of not going as we expect...
sometimes we get to see ways things turn out better than we imagined,
sometimes things go wrong, so wrong...
then it is hard to see the good - then it is so hard to not choose the curse.

When I returned from church, George was in a state of despair in stark contrast to the state of hope he had been in before I left.  George and his guardian angel, Clarence, are now splashing about in the water under a bridge.  George thinks life would have been better had he never been born.  Clarence shows him what that life would have looked like and it is not a pretty sight.  As Clarence says to him, "Strange, isn't it?  Each man's life touches so many other lives.  When he isn't around he leaves an awful hole, doesn't he?"  and "You see George, you've really had a wonderful life. Don't you see what a mistake it would be to just throw it away?"
 

As I've moved this past year and then this week have been spending time in my hometown, which hasn't been my home address in ~12 years.  I've been reflecting over the past year and years of my journey here, there, and everywhere... Most of these moments have caused me to remember dear friends - though I haven't kept up with near as many of them, near as well as I would have desired - I know that without them there would indeed be holes in my heart and my life.  I remember especially some of the send-offs these friends have given to me.  Things haven't gone as any of us thought they would have upon the eve of what lay ahead....  But upon each of those moments of transition, there has been a deep sense of gratitude for what has been...  And since the eve of what lies ahead overlaps with the end of what has been laid behind I can be encouraged about what the future holds because of the faithfulness and goodness I have experienced in the past.

The words of Clarence to George in a book inscription at the end of the movie rang quite true for me tonight - "Remember, George: no man is a failure who has friends."  Remembering my friends both those I chat with on the phone each week and those whose phone number I wouldn't even know where to look for - all of them stir my heart to chose to believe that the plans the Lord has for me are plans to prosper and not to harm, plans to give a future and a hope.