failure to control

Today, I paid a ticket issued to me by the Ohio State Trooper that showed up at my wreck...
Did you know you get a ticket when you have an accident?
This is one of numerous things I've learned in the past couple weeks.
Another lesson, check that the VIN number on your car matches the paperwork you sign (but that's a different story all together)

Guess what the ticket is for...

"failure to control"

Yep, I am guilty as charged...

Funny - it literally contains the word "control" which has been a key theme in all this, but also that it gives me an F for my ability to be in control...  I've never received an F.  Fear of failure has actually driven much of my "achievement" in life, driven much of my need to be in control...

Humbling to fail, Humbling to lose control

But I think letting go is good

A friend gave me this quote the night before I left State College after New Years and I thought of it just now

"For this is wrong, if anything is wrong:
not to enlarge the freedom of a love
with all the inner freedom one can summon.
We need, in love, to practice only this:
letting each other go.
For holding on comes easily;
we do not need to learn it."
~Ranier Maria Rilke (Requiem for a Friend)

I'm learning to let go...
especially of my fears of failure and of hurting others
and
I'm learning to yield to and trust the One who is in control...
letting go of what lies behind in order to receive what awaits ahead